The Trials and Tribulations of Bed Rest

I cannot count the number of times in the last year and a half that I have wished that I could just have a day to myself to lay around in bed and do nothing.  The idea of being able to sleep at leisure, read and watch TV during the middle of the day was so far from possible and sounded so appealing when compared to the day to day realities of motherhood. After 10 weeks of bed rest, I can officially say that I would kill do to be able to get out of bed in the morning, take care of my child and feel unsure how I was ever going to get everything I wanted to accomplish during my day done!

When we were first told that I had to go on strict bed rest for an indefinite length of time, our first concern, beyond the health of our unborn child, was Emmett.  Emmett is a very sweet, social and ACTIVE toddler.  He was also used to spending 90% of his time with his Mom.  Keeping him happy and busy was one of my largest feats every day.  If we weren't heading off to gymboree or a play date, we were running around the house playing (aka wearing out the toddler so he would sleep.)  Obviously, this routine had to change immediately.   In so many respects, we were so lucky when it came to making this tough time as easy as possible for Emmett.  The first stroke of luck is that Todd doesn't work a normal 9-5 job; he goes into work at 4:30 am, so he is usually home around 1:30.  The second fortuitous event was that we had a great babysitter who we used for date nights and occasional day time care who was available to work for us 3-4 mornings a week. Emmett loves her and is comfortable with her, which was what was most important to us.  The third area where were very fortunate is that we have a great group of friends and neighbors who offered to step in and help us out:  Allison and the girls come over most Fridays and play with Emmett, our neighbors set up a meal train for every Wednesday night, Canyon and Finn have started coming over and playing with us on Thursdays and Kysa has been bringing us dinner on Tuesdays.  Every one's support and generosity has been fabulous and I don't know if we will ever be able to express how much we appreciate it.

Luckily, last week I was told that I am off strict bed rest.  I still have to rest and be careful but I  can be alone with Emmett (for limited time periods) and can help Todd out with light house work- mostly laundry and simple meals.  I still get very tired, very easily and when I get tired or push it too hard I start to have contractions.  At 27 weeks, baby boy #2 is viable but going into labor at this point would be anything but ideal so I am still trying to take it very easy.  The modified bed rest couldn't have come at a better time for our family.  Mentally, not being able to care for my family or help my husband out around the house was wearing on me (and I am sure on Todd, as well.) So was the pressing feeling of being completely unprepared for the impending arrival of our new baby.  Additionally, Emmett seems to have developed a massive case of separation anxiety.  Meaning whenever he is separated from me, he cries like a wild animal and frantically tries to get to where I am.  He is even doing this when left alone with Todd, so you can imagine how fun it is for our sitter and I on the days that she is still here.

As for baby boy #2, he is growing big and strong.  I should only have one more ultrasound if things continue as they are now.  He is kicking and squirming and hitting and doing all the things that a 27 week old fetus does.  He keeps me awake at night and wakes me up in the morning moving around.  Emmett is sort of aware we are having another baby- if you ask him where his baby brother is, he either points to his belly or mine. We are working on getting this one right.  :)

Here are some photos of both of our boys:

Emmett at 20 Months

Happy Easter!

Helping Mommy bake muffins for breakfast.

My happy little guy :)

Hanging out under the kitchen table.

24 Week Ultrasound 

Can't wait to kiss those little toes!

BIG News

In my last post I said I wasn't going to offer up a bunch of excuses for being an absentee blogger for 3 months.  In this post, I am actually going to just offer up one reallly good excuse for not blogging for so long- I am pregnant again!  :)  Baby boy DeCook is due July 9, 2013.  Just 6 days before his big brother's 2nd birthday.  I didn't feel like I could blog without disclosing something so amazing and profoundly important to us but we didn't feel comfortable making it public until now.

Normally, we would have announced our new addition a couple months ago but the first half of this pregnancy has been a bit tumultuous.  We found out that we were pregnant on October 27th when I was not yet 4 weeks along.  About a week and a half later I started having some spotting.  Spotting early in the first trimester is not uncommon, between 30-50% of women experience it and more than 50% of them go on to have healthy, normal pregnancies.  That said, my doctor still told me at this point that I had to cut out all exercise until it subsided.  At a little before 8 weeks, we had our first ultrasound and everything appeared normal and showed that we had a healthy little baby growing inside me!  Then at 12 weeks, we got our genetic screening tests back and found out that we are having another baby boy!  (With no detectable chromosomal abnormalities.)

The only issue was that my spotting continued.  Around 13 weeks, in addition to the spotting I began to experience occasional bleeding.  At that point, my doctor surmised that it was just a cervical vascular issue that should run its course quickly.  At around 15 weeks, I started feeling  occasional tightening of my uterus and back aches that felt oddly like contractions. I assumed that they were just early braxton hicks. I notified my doctor and we agreed I should slow down my activity as much as I could, given that I had an 18 month old and had just moved.  Then at 16 weeks, the light occasional bleeding and spotting turned into a nightmarish evening that started with me hemorrhaging and ended with us in the emergency room fearing the worst.  I think I can speak for Todd, when I say that it was one of the scariest nights of our lives.

Thankfully, that evening ended well.  We were able to hear the baby's heart beat and have an ultrasound to see that he was still looking healthy and normal.  The ER doctor, however, was at a loss for what could have caused the hemorrhaging and referred me back to my regular OB.  When I saw the OB the next day, she too, was at a loss.  She then sent me to a perinatologist for an ultrasound and evaluation the next morning.  The ultrasound equipment at the perinatologist and the ultrasound tech were more advanced then at the ER, and the doctor was able to determine that I have a small placental abruption, meaning that the placenta is tearing away from the uterine wall.  This tearing had resulted in a hematoma or blood clot forming next to the placenta, hence the ongoing bleeding.

Knowing that the baby and I are healthy, and what has been causing my ongoing issues was a huge relief.  That said, this condition comes with a few risks and symptoms that we are doing our best to manage. The first is ensuring that the abruption doesn't get worse.   We are very lucky that the tear is small.  If it was bigger (or gets bigger), both the baby and I could be in real danger.  The second, is making sure that the contractions are under control and do not progress.  Having early contractions and uterine cramping/tenderness is a side effect of the abruption.  Unfortunately, 50% of women who have this issue deliver preterm.  We also need to monitor my blood loss from the clot, obviously, if I loose too much blood both of us are in danger.  As a result of all of these risks, my doctors agreed that I need to be on bedrest for the remainder of the pregnancy.

This all happened when I was 16 weeks.  I am now nearly 21 weeks, still on bedrest and have contractions and painful cramping regularly   All that said, things are looking up- we had a great ultrasound and our little guy is measuring big for how far along we are. Also, the blood clot is getting smaller and my cervix is still long, meaning despite the contractions I am not progressing towards labor.  I have another ultrasound at 23 weeks, and I am hoping that if it goes well I will get a little bit of slack on the bedrest.   Despite the roller coaster of the the last couple of months and all the unexpected stress this condition has caused us, Todd and I are overjoyed about the new addition to our little family!!  Here are some of our first photos of our sweet little baby boy:

His sweet little toes.  Can't wait to tickle those little things!

Our 19 week ultrasound was a long one.  The little guy gave being poked for an hour a thumbs down. :)

He managed to get his little thumb into his mouth while we were watching. You could actually see his little mouth sucking on it. 

His sweet little profile.

At slightly under 8 weeks, our little tappole

Proof, beyond his Y chromosome, that he is a little boy.

We're BACKKKK!!! (Winter Recap)

Well, it's been a very long time!  I could provide all sorts of excuses for why I haven't been blogging- we celebrated the holidays, we moved, we have been busy getting settled...I think I am just going to skip that part, catch everyone up and move on!  I think the easiest way to get back into the swing of things is to just recap the last few months with photos.

October:

To get into the spirit of fall, we took Emmett to a pumpkin patch. He was much more interested in the barnyard animals then the pumpkins.

At 15 months, Emmett showed us that he is in fact a fearless climber. So much so, that we had to retire his high chair from everyday use because he was using it as a ladder to hop up onto the kitchen table.  Now he just uses his booster seat, but at least it's not as high...

In honor of his finely honed climbing skills, we dressed him as a monkey for Halloween. Here he is at the Lake Oswego Harvest Festival having a great time.

November:

He loves hiking with Mom and Dad.  The backpack that he hated a year ago is now SO MUCH FUN!

He loves bath time.  If we wait too long after dinner to get things going, he will just go climb in himself. Our boy loves the water!

Emmett has developed a fascination with Elmo. Well, actually, the fascination is with all the Sesame Street characters. We let him watch TV very infrequently, but somehow it has been enough for the obsession to develop.  He actually picked this shirt out himself while we were shopping one day :)

Emmett adores both his pets.  He gives them pets and cuddles all the time. He also imitates their noises constantly.

December:

For Christmas, we headed to California to see the Harpers and the Castellano/Dirth clans. Here Emmett and cousin Brady are cruising around Monterey in Brady's jeep.  Emmett thought it was SO cool.

We spent a day at the Monterey Bay Aquarium.  It is such an amazing place!

We had to remove clothes we got so wet in the toddler tide pool exhibit. I think we spent an hour in here while he touched everything he could get his salty little hands on. 

Opening early Christmas presents with his four cousins was so much fun for him! I think he enjoyed watching them more then opening his own gifts.

Emmett got to play on the big kid trampoline with his cousins. It was a little scary for Mom and Dad...

...but he thought it was pretty fun!

Opening presents Christmas morning with Aunt Melissa and Uncle Evan!

A truck!  Thank you Aunt Kacie and Uncle Rob!

Christmas Brunch.  Emmett has a blueberry syrup mask going on.

January:

There are many things Emmett loves about the new house- all the space to run around, the neighborhood kids, his playroom...Oh and the fact that he has his own kitchen cabinet that he is allowed to play in.  Most days we find random trucks and toys stored in here, along with all his cups and bowls. 

Emmett loves the new master bathroom shower. I find him playing in it all the time.

Our 18 month appointment went really well- clean bill of health, still skinny and long. Then they gave him shots. Don't worry, he was fine 3 minutes letter when I pulled out a cup of raisins.

Our New Routine(s)

We have been living in our rental apartment in suburbia for 8 weeks.  Going from living in a  home with a backyard to living in a small, temporary apartment and no yard with a toddler and a very energetic 80 lb dog has presented me with more than a few challenges.  I sort of feel like we are living in a cross between a poorly decorated hotel and a large playroom for a toddler.  Our largest respite these past weeks has been that the weather has been very un-Oregon, allowing us to really enjoy our close vicinity to the river and the lake.  Emmett, Vivian and I literally get up every day, have breakfast and then head outside for a jog or a walk.  If I wait too long after breakfast to get us outside, Emmett grabs Vivian's leash and climbs into his stroller himself while Vivian waits at the door staring at it as if she can will it to open with her gaze.  These morning outings are necessary to keep Vivian happy (and not so hyper I want to let her go play in traffic).  I am also hoping that on some level all of this activity will resonate with Emmett later in life and even if it's subconscious he will feel that getting out everyday for some exercise and fresh air is a mandatory activity.  A mom can dream, right?

Another part of being living space challenged is that Emmett and I are doing everything we can to participate in activities outside the house.  I joined a great Mom's group in Lake Oswego, and through this group we have been doing Gymboree, other children's "gyms", book time at the library, going on play dates and walks and are even trying our first "Art" class this Friday. (The last one should be an experience!)  I've also gotten to attend a few Mom's nights out and socials, which have been a great way for me to learn about our new community.

The only real curve ball in our activity has been Emmett's schedule.  For the last 6+ months, we have had a beautiful, wonderful, predictable schedule.  Emmett would sleep 12 hours a night.  He would wake up and we would play and go for our morning exercise and then he would take a 1-2 hour nap 2 hours after he woke up.  3 hours after his morning nap, we would repeat the process for his afternoon nap.  Bedtime was 7 pm.  It was glorious.  It was like clockwork and I knew what to expect every day.  These days, it is less so.  We are in an awkward transition period where Emmett is between needing 1 and 2 naps a day.  It is more like he needs 1.25 per day.  I never know which child I am going to get in the morning- the kid who wants to play until noon and then snooze until 2 pm or the baby who needs his 3 hours of naps in the morning and afternoon.  When I misjudge, meltdown doesn't begin to describe the situation.  It also makes getting to our scheduled activities more challenging.  We really have to play it one day at a time and make a lot of loose plans.  Fortunately, we have run into a number of parents with older kids recently who have commiserated with us and told us that 12-18 months was a really rough phase for their toddlers and that magically at 18 months they entered into another golden period.  I cannot wait!

Beyond the whole napping and ensuing tantrum issues, Emmett is wonderful. He is adorable and healthy.  He chats up a storm.  Only he and his beloved stuffed bunny understand most of the conversation, but they seem to be having a lot of laughs.  We have 5 words that Todd and I understand- Mama, Dada, cat (CA), dog (DA), banana (BAbaba) and occasionally up. He has gone from walking to running.  Everywhere.  Preferably away from his parents in public. At the same time he is also still appropriately, and wonderfully clingy.  Whenever he is warming up to a situation or is unsure, he makes it very clear he still needs reassurance from his Mom or Dad and we are happy to oblige. :)  He loves his parents, his pets and he loves to PLAY!

Where we run every day.  There are worse views in the world.

Emmett walking his dog.  Yes, our crazy 80 lb dog lets the baby walk her. Until she sees a squirrel, that is.

We recently took a vacation with my parents.  They rented a lovely house on San Juan Island.  This is one of the incredible sunsets we had looking out at Orcas and Lopez Islands from the balconey.

Baby beach attire in the Northwest.

He loved the water.  He would have just gone right in if we hadn't held on to him!

The bay at Roche Harbor was calmer than the water in the previous photo AND there were little fish he could see. He was determined to sit in the ~50 degree water and catch them.  Obviously we didn't allow that to happen...

"They won't let me sit in the water...sob...I just want to sit in the water and play with the fishies.  NO pictures."

Our little water baby.

Grandma and Grandpa always get smiles. :)

Ode to 3206 SE Lincoln (and other updates)

In south east Portland, on the corner of 32nd and Lincoln St sits a little green house.  This sweet little house was not just the first house that either Todd or I bought.  It was our first home together.  It was where we became a family.   We got engaged and married while living there.  We went through our first pregnancy, decorated our first nursery and brought Emmett home to that house.  Emmett learned to crawl and walk there.  We learned how to be parents there.  On August 2nd, the three of us walked through the house one last time, trying to soak up all the memories, and then drove away for the last time.

I can honestly say, I was shocked at how sad I was to leave our home.  As we walked through each room reminiscing and saying goodbye, it occurred to me how much of ourselves we had put into the house and how big a part of our lives it had been.  There wasn't an inch of that house that we didn't leave our mark on and that doesn't hold a very poignant memory for one or both of us.  Now, a new family will be living there and making it their home.  We have to move on to the next chapter of our lives-  the suburbs. 

Our next house is in a new development in Lake Oswego and will not be finished being built until December.  Right now, it is currently just a dirt lot with a bunch of stakes marking where our driveway, house and backyard will be. Until this dirt lot has been magically transformed into our new house, we are renting a small apartment in downtown Lake Oswego.  The location is great.  That's all I can really say about the apartment.  And honestly, as long as we are all together it feels like home and I am happy.  That said, we are really excited and anxious to be in our new house. Everyone keep your fingers crossed it will be completed on time and we can spend Christmas in our new house and start making memories in our next home!

Emmett is becoming a toddler before my eyes.  He is walking, and trying to run now.  He refuses to hold my hand in public because he's too independent.  He is starting to try to talk- he has gotten out "Hi" and "Cat".  (Although sometimes cat sounds more like gat.)  He attempts to talk to people by letting out high pitched squeals when his limited vocabulary or adorable smile fails to  engage them.  He is really into mimicking everything we do now, especially when we eat- every meal needs to start out with him using a plate or a bowl and sometimes utensils.  (All of which inevitably end up on the floor...) 

We took him on a trip to Seattle this weekend.  We saw lots of boats, planes, cars, trucks and went to the aquarium.  Anything with a motor is a big hit these days- he is all BOY.  Below are a few photos from our trip AND a link to all the photos from first birthday party we threw with the twins back in June.

CLICK HERE- Emmett and the Twins First Birthday Party

We caught him right before he put two little hand prints on the shiny red car.

He thought the anemone was awesome.

Jelly Fish.

Looking at the seals play.

Bill Gates' car.  Todd and I were less than 5 feet from the man when he pulled up to our hotel and ran past us. Turns out I had been standing next to his father who was waiting for him to have dinner.

My Sweet Little BOY!!

A year ago at this time I was eagerly (and impatiently) awaiting Emmett's arrival. It's both hard to believe it has only been a year and amazing at how quickly time has flown by. It seems like it was yesterday that he was laid on my chest after being born, his sweet newborn cries being answered with my inadequate greeting of "hi".  There really is no way to describe how full our lives have become since that amazing moment.

The changes a baby goes through in the first year of life are so profound and rapid that if you blink you just might miss something. During this time there are so many moments that need to be remembered and cherished. I think that we have done a great job capturing these moments with photos and videos, but as our sweet little angel begins transitioning from an entirely dependent baby to a less dependent child, there are more tactile things I know I will always miss and am so scared I will forget.  Like how soft and perfect his skin is, the smell of his hair, the way he always rests his head on your shoulder in gratitude when you first pick him up, the feel of his little fingers as he grabs at me for reassurance, the warmth of his little body cuddling up to me as he falls asleep every night, the funny bird noise he loves to make by rolling his little tongue and the way he looks at me when he laughs...oh my, that sweet laugh. It melts my heart.

As sad as part of me is that tomorrow he will be one, a bigger part of me is so excited to see the toddler, boy and man that he will become.   Emmett is amazing.  He is perfect.  He also already has very distinct and inherent personality traits.   As his parents, we need to learn how to best mold the perfect little human we created based on his innate personality.   As I have been pondering the nuances of my sweet little man, I have been thinking of all the things I want to teach him as he gets older.  The list is long.  Of course it includes the typical parental hopes of creating an adult who is kind, good to others and successful.  I am sure as time progresses my list will change with his age and the success we have in guiding him.  At this very moment, I would say these are my the things that I most want to instill in my perfect little boy:

• Emulate your father. He is an unbelievable role model to illustrate to you how to treat your partner in life and take care of your family.
•  Remain appropriately sensitive.  You have one of the most wonderfully expressive dispositions I have ever encountered. Continue to let yourself feel everything but don't let your emotions rule your life. 
• Stay excited. I wish I could bottle your unbridled joy in everything that you do, see and learn.  Please don't ever loose this excitement.  It is part of what makes you so amazing and such a joy to be around.
• You are stubborn.  You inherited this trait from both your parents. Harness this to become tenacious and determined. If you do not let it define your character, it will enable you to achieve great things.
•  Appreciate life. No matter what is thrown your way, you are one fortunate, blessed and loved man. Never loose sight of how lucky this makes you.
• Seize opportunities. This is different from taking risks. It is our job to teach you the difference between the two. Lesson #1- Running for the stairs when I forget to put up the kiddy gate is a RISK.  Grabbing food off my plate when I am not paying attention is an opportunity. 
•  Be confident, not overly proud.  You like to show off all that you accomplish, which is adorable in a baby.  It is not in a grown man.  
• You are beautiful.  Physically.  Emotionally.  Intellectually. Beautiful.  Don't forget it and don't believe anyone who tells you otherwise.
• Share.  Right now you are the center of the universe, and you LOVE it.  This will not always be the case.  I promise, we will have enough toys (and Mommy's time) to go around.
• Seek Fulfillment.  You have been given so many unbelievably amazing natural gifts and we will  provide you with every possible advantage that we can.  Please, please, please take advantage of this and do something that will make you happy and be fulfilled in life.
• You are loved.  Your father and I will always love you more than anything in the world. No matter what. No matter where you are.  No matter what you do. You are the most important person in the world to us. This will never, ever, ever change.

Happy Birthday, Sweet Boy!!

The morning after he was born.

4 Weeks

8 Weeks old.

3 Months

4 Months

5 Months

6 Months

7 Months

8 Months

9 Months

10 Months 

11 Months

Yesterday (Almost 12 Months)