4 Weeks of Emmett

Emmett was born 4 weeks ago tonight.  There really are no words to describe how happy he has made us.  I truly cannot imagine my life without him.  Becoming a parent is such a surreal experience that it really makes you introspective and nostalgic about many, many aspects of your life.  One thing I have been reminiscing about the last week is the actual pregnancy itself.

While I was pregnant, I truly did NOT enjoy the experience- I was fat, I was uncomfortable, I didn't feel like my body was my own and I had no control over what was happening to me or the life inside of me that I was responsible for keeping safe. People would approach me and exclaim how much they loved being pregnant, elaborating on what an amazing experience it is and share the wondrous details of their pregnancies.  I would nod politely and inwardly think that they were NUTS.  How could anyone enjoy being pregnant???  Did they not share the same discomforts that I experienced?? Or was something just wrong with me?  Was I lacking some feminine or maternal gene that brought about these feelings in other women?  I could not understand how they they could have just forgotten all the little things that combine into one very long, unpleasant 40 week period.

Now that my pregnancy is complete and I have met my son, I feel so differently. Something about his sweet face, the way that he looks at me and how much he needs me makes it all seem unbelievably worthwhile.  I would have been pregnant for years if that was what was required to have him.  Even reflecting back on labor doesn't change my feelings. I would voluntarily be in labor and push for days if necessary to ensure his safe arrival.  (Of course, I would still want my epidural...) I won't say that every little memory about my pregnancy make me smile and fill me with happiness but I will say that whenever I think back on all the gory details of the experience I end up bypassing most of it and remembering that the end result was Emmett.  His existence makes me so happy that is all I can focus on.  There are things that I even miss about being pregnant- like being able to eat whatever I want and feeling him squirm around inside of me.  Even though a lot of the time it hurt me to have him kicking, kneeing and punching his little hands in utero, it was my introduction to him and was the first time I was able to interact with this little person who has changed my life so profoundly.

Tonight, at various points in the evening I would look over at Emmett and Todd and remind them both what we were all doing 4 weeks ago at that point in time.  Todd looked at me with amusement because the discomfort of the pregnancy and birth isn't clouded in his mind; Emmett just stared and smiled like he does when I talk to him and I fondly reminisced about one of the most painful nights of my life. The truth is that I now understand those crazy ladies who loved being pregnant and am looking forward to the next time I get pregnant and get to create another little amazing being.

Emmett has changed so much in the last week.  We have started to get him onto a schedule- he now eats for around a half hour every 3 hours.  This is working out very well for both of us- he gained a pound in the last week and I get some time to do things during the day and a few hours of sleep at night.  He is starting to be awake and alert for several hours out of every day and is beginning to enjoy his play mat, staring out the windows and at ceiling fans and lights.  He also got to meet some of his family and his future friends this week- the Grenley's came up from California to visit and the William's twins.

Look at the little belly he's developing and the cute, chubby roles on his legs and arms!

The Grenley's
Great Aunt Julie, Me, Kate, Great Uncle Rick, Spencer

Emmett, Francesca and Melina
Not a whole lot of interaction YET but I am sure they will have a lot of fun together in a couple of months!